MovieChat Forums > Harold and Maude (1971) Discussion > Why does Maude visit funerals?

Why does Maude visit funerals?

posted 8 years ago by tmaj48
4 replies | jump to latest

Harold does so because he's obsessed with death and suicide and feels he'd be better off dead. But why does Maude attend so many, too? Is she the real depressive in the movie, and does her tragic past make her envy the dead? If she were truly the "life is a banquet" type that she pretends to be, why would she want to spend so much time visiting the funerals of strangers and experiencing displays of grief and loss?

Is her campaign to make Harold see all the joy in life around him just a way of
trying to offset her own thoughts of death and sadness? At the end, she's the one who successfully carries out her own suicide, calmly and sincerely instead of merely playacting like Harold's attempts, and maybe she got together with Harold because she saw he was as sad as she was and she made it her final
act in life to prove to him that he was so much more fortunate than she had been, and needed to cure him of his depressive nature?

I'm not crying, you fool, I'm laughing!

Hewwo.

[–] OhNooos 8 years ago

You may have hit upon the dual nature of Maude. She attends the funerals as a celebration of life on the surface. But it's also probably darkly related to her past as you've pointed out. Maybe not envy, but in working out some of her lingering feelings. There's always survivors' guilt as one possibility. It may also be an attempt to understand more.

I do believe that, for the most part, she had found a place for her grief and sadness and truly wanted to rescue Harold from his lack of engagement in life. Her suicide came off as positive because she was the one in charge, telling the world when she felt it was time to leave and not waiting for some other force, such as disease, to make that decision. In a way, it could be seen as another way of surviving the camps and defying the Nazis - by choosing her moment to die, on her own terms and not theirs.

One aspect of her decision to end her life at her "perfect" or "ideal" number (when she thought it was time), was the implied statement that life was meant to be lived only when one was young enough or healthy enough to enjoy it. I realize this goes back to Maude choosing her terms, but in a way, I see this as a negative statement about old age or infirmity and the value of life itself.

[–] truetexian 8 years ago

What sort of positive statement can be said of "infirmity"? The only one I can think of is that it provides opportunity for the development of empathy and charity within others, those who encounter the sick and aged.

I suppose we could get all high-minded and spiritual and say that it also provides the elderly and dying the chance to "take stock" of their life, providing them one last opportunity to value and appreciate the health they once had.

But I'm not so sure I'm inclined to do so.

Maude appears to be healthy, albeit aged. However, we don't really know for sure but as viewers it's suggested to us to assume so. Thus to some degree her decision to end her life seems arbitrary, even selfish and hypocritical given all that she strives to awaken within Harold.

The key difference however is that the two characters are at diametrically opposed positions in life.

After such a full and rich life as Maude's, it's perfectly logical, rational, and I would hope within one's rights for someone with no family nor loved ones to elect not to become vulnerable and dependent upon strangers in order to "survive".

[–] OhNooos 8 years ago

There is no positive about infirmity (except in the karmic sense, perhaps, because of what it teaches us and others about empathy), but that wasn't my point. By choosing to end her life before she became infirm, there's an implied statement that life isn't worth living if one is aged and infirm. My point is that life has value, even when one has infirmity. Otherwise, we would make a statement that those who are disabled have no value.

After such a full and rich life as Maude's, it's perfectly logical, rational, and I would hope within one's rights for someone with no family nor loved ones to elect not to become vulnerable and dependent upon strangers in order to "survive".

Good point. I would still say that it's not enough of a goal. I look to Morrie from Tuesdays with Morrie to illustrate my position. Morrie became so infirm and dependent on others that he needed help toileting. He realized that his life still had value, even at that point, because of his connections to others and what they brought out in himself and others.

On the other hand, I wouldn't hold it against someone who wanted out after having lived so long. At some point, you simply get tired and are ready to go. This was one part of Maude's story that really stuck with me and I sort of liked the number of 80 as well.

[–] truetexian 8 years ago

I find discussions like this interesting and important but they so seldom occur. Sorely, individuals too often avoid thinking about end of life decisions and hardly ever engage in discussions in which they can share and mull over their opinions.

I love how "Harold & Maude" evoked thought "beyond the box". Our views don't seem far apart, but I'm not ready to accept that Higgins was implying that life wasn't worth living if one's aged and infirm. Beyond telling a story about two very specific characters if he was advocating for a consensus from his audience on any topic it's my opinion it was for personal choice and freedom at every point in one's life.

"I wouldn't hold it against someone who wanted out....". Although I most definitely understand what you mean, I think it speaks to the heart of what Higgins might have been saying: it's not our's to judge.