MovieChat Forums > Who's the Boss? (1984) Discussion > Why were there shows about Male Babysitt...

Why were there shows about Male Babysitters In The 80's ????

posted 14 years ago by FloatingOpera7
33 replies | jump to latest

Who's The Boss - Tony Danza as a man babysitter/nanny/housekeeper.

Mr. Belvedere - combination butler, housekeeper/ male nanny.

Charles In Charge - young man taking care of a family's children.

What is this about ? LOL Guys, men, males, do not work as baby sitters or nannies, and they didn't do it in the 80's and don't do it today or ever have. I don't know of any male nanny. It was very unrealistic. I love those shows but I never gave it a thought back then as a kid watching these shows in the 80's. These were "realistic" comedies set in the real world back then to me but looking back now that I am a very grown adult I find the premise of the shows as being totally untrue to real life.

I love the cute charm of 80's shows- loved Small Wonder as a kid, loved seeing Mr Belvedere, loved seeing Facts of Life, Cosby Show, Family Ties, etc but they were far from realistic. They were cutsey wootsey shows about happy families without really delving into dark issues or problems when you compare them to today's more real-based shows I don't like today's TV and do prefer 80's shows but really they were unrealistic.

Guys simply cannot hope to get a job as a babysitter. It's always been a female job. Women are hired as babysitters and housekeepers not men.

[–] Bowties_are_Cool 14 years ago

Charles in Charge was by far the most unrealistic.Who would hire a college boy to watch their highschool aged daughtors?

[–] FloatingOpera7 14 years ago

Right, but just the fact that guys were being hired as male housekeepers and babysitters wasn't true to life. No guy works as a housekeeper or nanny, neither an ethnic or white guy. Housekeepers are usually Hispanic women and nannies are either ethnic or white, but they are all women/females

[–] mikeflw1 10 years ago

I am guessing you didn't grow up with/around the "women's lib" days of the 1970's...

How about the movie "MR. MOM"? (Michael Keaton...)

And there ARE stay-at-home Dad's these days...

Besides that, the latest official population reports in the USA have 51% of people now listed as "single". Hint: It isn't all single Mom's...

[–] Geekery 14 years ago

I've actually worked in a company that had a male housekeeper--and he was straight.

-----
RIP Daisy

[–] alanshoreswife 14 years ago

What a sexist statement from the OP of course there are male babysitters and nannies. Of course it mainly is a womans occupation but you saying there are no
male nannies is like saying there are no female mechanics or engineers known mainly as male professions.

[–] mikeflw1 10 years ago

Yep!

One of the customers at a "big box home goods" store was a jet engine mechanic. I know that because she brought in a lawnmower for repairs (bent crankshaft = totaled; hit a tree root), and ended up replacing the engine herself. And I worked with a number of very capable women engineers in high-tech companies; (varying specialties BTW).

Some of **the assumptions** were both humourous and disturbing at the same time. One of the customers was impressed that the "tech" company had sent a secretary to do the "keyboarding" for us (male engineers). I really didn't know how to break it to him (a senior manager in his company) that the woman was the Software Group manager (of about four dozen programmers...), and was making changes to the computer Operating System, that she wrote... (to clarify, she wrote the changes she was entering, to the OS she helped design and write).

[–] whatevertrev 14 years ago

That is untrue. There are tons of male nannies! I used to be a nanny, here in NYC. Not all of them were gay either. Being a live in nanny is a great way for people to save on rent and living expenses while still getting paid and possibly afford them time and money to go to school.

I have also known quite a few male house keepers.....they are usually called butlers though and they are, in fact, Caucasian and ethnic lol.

I agree that television in the 80's was great. Who cares if it was unrealistic? It was television and it was meant to be enjoyable for the family. I don't like the shows of today. Too much bad language and violence and drinking lol.....plain stupidity. And people wonder why their kids are brats and the world is going to hell in hand basket.....maybe because all that crap the kids see and they want to be like it because they think it's cool. I'd love to go back to that 80's!!

[–] FloatingOpera7 14 years ago

I love 80's TV Shows and 80's culture but I just don't think it was realistic to have male babysitters on TV. I mean who can relate to that ?

You say you knew some male nannies but if they are out there, it's very rare, very uncommon. Most nannies are young females or older ethnic women who also work as housekeepers and cook for their employers. Being a live in nanny is getting rarer these days. That is usually for nannies of very wealthy families who own a large enough home to have an extra room for the nanny. A regular middle class family hires nannies but they work only during the day time and then return to their home at night and don't live in the same house because it's not big enough.

It's just terribly unrealistic to have guys like Belvedere living in a middle class home and being a male nanny and butler to a middle class family in Pittsburg. Also unrealistic for a college student like Charles (Scott Baio) from Charles in Charge to care for kids including a teenager in high school - who was good looking too. Also unrealistic for Tony Danza to do his thing as a male housekeeper and nanny in Who's THe Boss.

They were great shows, better television than today but not realistic at all. It was escapism from reality which is what made it enjoyable

[–] whatevertrev 14 years ago

You must not be from the east coast. There are a crazy amount of live in nannies in middle class families. They are primarily placed there by agencies. As for male nannies, yes there may be less of them out there then females, but they're still out there. I don't see anything wrong with the idea that Tony could be in that house doing that job. Nothing seems off to me about it. But I grew up here in NYC, so I've seen it all.

[–] Bowties_are_Cool 14 years ago

Tony didn't seem to weird they gave it a reason,that I thought worked. Mr.Belvedere going from wealthy British families to a a middle class American family was odd,a rich family would have made more sense.
I still think Charles was the most unrealistic,him being a college guy and them having a highschool aged daughter.

I hear they eat you when you die.

[–] jenni_doll_1 14 years ago

Unrealistic or not, I believe the whole point of shows like "Who's the Boss?", "Mr. Belvedere, and "Charles in Charge" was to refute traditional sterotypes of gender roles. I agree that the professions of housekeeper or nanny have generally always been thought of as primarily female dominated, however, the 80's was a time when it was becoming increasingly more common for men and women to swap traditional roles, that is, women were going to work while men stayed home and took care of the house and kids. The title "Who's the Boss?" is a clear reference to this type of role reversal. The show "Growing Pains" was another good example of this, and like the other shows mentioned here, I think, the intended purpose was to show that, contrary to long held societal beliefs, men really could be efficient and proactive in the domestic role.

[–] SataiDelen 11 years ago

I think the post by Jenni_doll_1 states it best. Role reversal. But not role reversal simply for the sake of showing role reversal, but more the fact that in the '80s, it was a fact that many women were entering the work force either because their husbands had lost work (think of Mr. Mom), or they were the product of divorce or widowed, and needed to work to provide for their families. At the same time, yes, in some areas, men were turning to alternative work so that they could earn money for themselves or their familes. So it is not unrealistic that there would be men as nannies or housekeepers.

Perhaps where the OP is from though, this is/was unusual. However, for many other places, it is not unusual (as stated by several people in this thread).

[–] mikeflw1 10 years ago

FYI,

TV has been a medium for changes in society. So, it doesn't always *follow*, it can, and sometimes, leads...

As a small part of STAR TREK trivia,
the actress that played Lt. Uhura (ran the communications of the starship Enterprise) approached Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. to go on marches and public appearences with his marches. He told her to stay in her job as a black, female, OFFICER in the TV show because that was doing far more good than "adding one" to the crowds...
Another trivia bit... Uhura's kiss with Kirk (even though compelled by the mind-controlling aliens in the episode) was the first inter-racial kiss on TV, ever.

Imagine that.
(What was that about the liberal Hollywood people again?)

[–] cinsmith1 14 years ago

Well, in the case of Mr. Belvedere he was more of a butler who occasionally kept an eye on the kids (kinda like Mr. French) and in the case of Charles it was more of a live-in college student who only took care of the kids when the non-working mom wasn't there (but the father frequently was out of town so wanting the live-in student to be male isn't much of a surprise as there needed to be a man in the house to protect the womenfolk & the homestead). As far as the Powells go; he kinda came with the house.

[–] cluvonj 14 years ago

Someone else mentioned Mr French of Family Affair. ANother was Bud, the Grandfather on My Three Sons and later Uncle Charley. Sure they were related but they were the live in housekeepers, cooks and nannies to the kids when the dad was not there. Mr. French was that way to Uncle Bill's kids too. This was done in the 60's which was way before the 80's.

I also have heard in the last 10 or more yrs of men cleaning houses as a business so they are housekeepers even if they are not live in.

Tonight I saw for the first time that new show "Melissa & Joey" with Melissa JOan Hart and Joey Lawrence and I see they have made him a Nanny to Melissa's neice and Nephew and this 2010. It does seem a bit odd to see him in that role but I enjoyed the one episode I have seen so far.

[–] iluvcallalilies 13 years ago

Mr. Belvedere seemed odd for a family of that class to have a Butler at all - but in his case, as it was Butler, it fit for the character.

WTB explained it well in the beginning (it was odd even to Angela, Mona persuaded her).

Charles in Charge - the weird part was leaving a college boy in charge of high school girls for sure - no one in their right mind would do THAT.

What I found strange was that they were all middle class families (except Angela) - who has a nanny or butler or housekeeper AT ALL?

[–] FloatingOpera7 13 years ago

Look why beat around the bush. We all know that it's extremely strange and rare for a man to be a babysitter, nanny or housekeeper. Would you trust your small children to an adult man in his 20's, 30's or 40's ? The big fear in our current dangerous world is that a man you don't know and is not a family member is spending a lot of alone time with your kids, owing to the many cases of child abuse and sexual predators and pedophiles. Because of so many pedophiles out there, no one is going to hire some man as a nanny. Women are trusted to be nannies because we all know the society gender thing about how we think women are naturally better with children then men, and because women become mothers or because even some older nannies have had children of their own, they are much more safe and more trusted with kids than with some man. It's also seen as being emasculated for a man to be a nanny to children. Or doing household chores as a housekeeper like cleaning toilets, washing dishes, washing windows or using the vacuum. The household domain with care of children and keeping house is always always seen as being "woman's work". The idea is an adult man should be working in a "man job" - going out into the world and holding down a real job, from anything like construction worker, postal service, UPS truck driver to airplane pilot or doctor. Close your eyes when you hear the world "nanny". You immediately think of a woman, either a mature older woman or a young woman. And again also when we think of the word "housekeeper" we usually think of an ethnic, usually Hispanic woman who works as maid like the ladies who do your bed and clean your room in a hotel. The housekeepers I've known for 25 years have all been Hispanic women. Never never a white adult man.

So the post who wrote that the only reason they had men like Mr. Belvedere or Tony Danza in Who's the Boss or Scott Baio in Charles in Charge working as nannies or housekeepers is because the shows were simply doing it for the heck of it and the sake of "role reversal" is correct. These were unrealistic TV series with normally realistic dialog and life-like scenarios but that are in the end really unrealistic and simply family-friendly lessons that aspired to teach life lessons.

Isn't it also interesting that in the 90's you had a show like The Nanny with Fran Drescher, about an obnoxious live-in nanny to wealthy New York children ? The show is unrealistic because her character is too over the top and she doesn't really do much except wear expensive clothes and say hilarious jokes. We never see her actively working as a realistic New York Manhattan nanny would. She also gets to marry the widowed boss Mr. Sheffield which is also unlikely and too much like "The Sound of Music" or those other type of stuff where the nanny marries the boss. It sometimes can happen but it rarely happens.

[–] icon-9 13 years ago

Also, I Dream of Jeannie, and Bewitched. Soooo unrealistic! Why did the men want to repress the women's magical powers? What's up with that? And Gilligan's Island!! Why did nobody drown in the shipwreck, or get pregnant on that island? And they had that brilliant professor who made anything and everything out of bamboo and rags, but somehow repairing the SS Minnow, or building a bamboo sea-going vessel was just impossible. Sooo unrealistic. And Gilligan is always doing stupid things and making adorable mistakes, but HE'S A GUY!!! Pfft. That's just unrealistic. Everyone knows only girls can be cute funny idiots in real life. Male idiots are just obnoxious and unacceptable.

...

[–] pioneergrrrl (2393) 4 years ago

Bewitched was about interracial marriage--Samantha and Darrin are actually married.....and 'interracial marriage' would not be legal until 1967. So it was a commentary on how these couples learn to live.....like a nosy neighbor trying to report on 'odd behavior' and her relatives also not liking him even though he's 'mainstream',

I Dream of Jeannie is merely about dating--but Tony is 'not right in the head' according to the government (yes) where he conveniently works because of his relationship. This is a recurring theme throughout the series. It comments on race yes, but also on people w disabilities and even homosexuality (which too was a crime) mortals don't care what Tony does with Jeannie but the psychiatrist who can declare him 'sick' and remove him from the government itself--does.

[–] mikeflw1 10 years ago

The housekeepers I've known for 25 years have all been Hispanic women.

You should probably watch SPANGLISH with Paz Vega (Spanish actress).
Also, I guess you haven't seen the Ally Sheedy movie MAID TO ORDER.
It was a *twisted* fairy godmother sort of tale where a spoiled out-of-control daughter so monumentally misbehaved, her father (a single parent) made a wish that he never had a daughter.
and so it was...

She is somewhat unaware of the switheroo, but eventually realizes the only job she was qualified for was a maid/houskeeper, (met the fairy godmother that told her she had to change her ways to be worthy of getting her life back, and father!), and she was terrible at that until she finally admitted to her shortcomings and the regular house staff helped her by teaching her. The "lady of the house" even made a comment over the phone that she had a new maid, and she is white! She would have been fired a few times, except for her status value... *smirk*

As for THE SOUND OF MUSIC, Maria was studying to become a nun, (typical teachers back in those days), so she had learned about *manners and class*, and was educated, contrary to most traditional maids and/or nannies, (being older women who raised families, but had little or no higher education).

And that goes to why men traditionally do not have those jobs. Traditional blue-collar **men's jobs** usually pay better.
Young and stronger men have "other uses", say construction, roofing (about the lowest job, because of the hot tar, sun, heat, etc), oil field roughnecks, mining, farming, etc., that pay the bills better. (BTW, I would have added truck driver, but I saw a bikini top, bluejean short-shorts, and boots-wearing truck driver in Detroit when she got out of her big rig.) That sort of changed after the 1980s when the "dot-com" bubble burst, and there were suddenly MANY highly educated/trained people unemployed, and jobs they would have filled were simply gone, and they were physically unqualified for other jobs. A smaller version of the "dot-com" bubble did occur in the 1980's, affecting a lot of highly educated/trained people as well.
People who didn't want to relocate (ailing senior parent(s), kids in senior year of high school, etc.) had to find jobs that paid bills.

The other factor, these days, is changes in the tax laws were made to collect more taxes by counting the live-ins' room and board as compensation, PLUS their actual paychecks/cash, for their work as maids, housekeepers, cooks, butlers, chauffers, nannies, etc.. That had to be handled by the employers, (the workers didn't have the ability to pay taxes on the SUDDENLY increased "wages" they were being paid). (no joke... except the paid part...) Cue the decrease in live-ins... (perhaps even the lower standard-of-living for many of those occupations - counterproductive to collecting more taxes in the bigger picture???)

[–] jefgg 11 years ago

Hasn't there been an increase in men working as domestic staff?

[–] Ken1260 10 years ago

If you want you can go further back to Mr French on Family Affair.

[–] not_favre 10 years ago

I grew up with a male nanny. But I just called him Dad.

[–] Noirdame79 10 years ago

I had a male babysitter when I was a kid. No one batted an eye. I had no problem with him and neither did my parents.

Because of political correctness, there seems to be the assumption that all males are potential sexual predators, which is unfair and untrue. And there are cases where women have posed dangers to children too. Really, it comes down to who you trust.

[–] mikeflw1 10 years ago

Oh my gosh...

Political correctness, sounds about right...

I also have to reluctantly guess there HAVE BEEN incidents around people that are so suspicious/frightened about issues like that.
Does that also rule out adoptions, blended families, step-mother/father, hosting exchange students, and even having ANY other people in your home?

My wife and I hosted several exchange students, (wife was an only child, I was oldest of many kids), and one student (girl) refused to have a photo taken sitting on Santa's lap. Fair enough, culture and traditions were different in other countries. She was petite enough that she sat on the bench next to Santa though. We told the exchange program's co-ordinator about that, (to pass the word that other host families might also encounter that), and she had also noticed that girl would not voluntarily even stay in the same room with any adult male present... Meals were only a temporary exception, and the girl was the first one finished and out of the room. Movie nights went the same way... And before you have to ask, yes, she considered me an adult male, rather than her host-father, and never changed that behavior. Sad.

===>> On the other hand, some of my wife's friends had jobs as a mall Santa Claus, and OH, some of the stories they had about the kids! I am not talking about the usual stories of kids spilling, wetting them, spitting up on their suits, even vomiting, or just screaming because they were afraid of Santa.
We heard this one when we mentioned that student to them. SURPRISE!!! None of them had done the job before, so they were pretty naive. Apparently there were several groups of 12-yr old girls that deliberately squirmed while they sat on Santa's lap, and later giggled to each other about what they were doing to the guy in the suit. --->(Say WHAT?!?!?!?)<---
One of the guys was finished with his shift inside a store (out of costume) and was standing nearby one of the groups and overheard the girls discussing their "adventures" with Santa. When the guys compared notes, so to speak, they had each encountered several groups like that during the day. After they talked, they really didn't know what to do... they could NOT report that to their employers, could they? They told us their solution was to wear an athletic cup to work. BTW, they have never played Santa again, and warned their friends...

And out of hundreds of exchange students in the area, one of the Swedish girls got "too interested" in a host family 'brother' and had to be moved to another family...

Sorry, it isn't only the guys, or the adults.

It truly does come down to who you trust.

We didn't allow our students to go to someone's home until, and unless, we met at least one parent, and the friend they would be visiting, (gender irrelevant). Yes, we did come to an impass with one of the families with the same rules, (first time for both families BTW!), and we decided on a picnic or an activity where everybody could get to "size up" the others first... no problem.

We also pointed out to the students that it is unusual in the USA for a family to have two parents at home, less than 50%... look it up if you wish.

And just what happened to the parents/guardians of those 12-yr olds anyway?!?

[–] pioneergrrrl (2393) 4 years ago

My brother and I also had a male babysitter but we were also in elementary school. We weren't in jr high/high school. By that time, my parents decided it was more cost effective to leave us home alone.