8. Kids between the ages of 12 and 18 actually hold all of the power on an Air Force Base.
9. Playing really crappy 80s music makes your F-16 go extra fast and recoup 20 minutes of lost time in under two minutes flat.
10. The peanut farmer Jimmy Carter was a pussy president. "Ray-gun" Reagan has the cojones to knock the teeth out of terrorist states...although even though Reagan is president in this film, he doesn't do anything to go after the unnamed Middle Eastern country.
11. Leaders of unnamed Middle Eastern countries have nothing better to do than to listen for the military frequency warnings (in English) of incoming pirated F-16 planes.
12. Firing a few rounds of the gun of a F-16 can cause aircraft control towers, radar towers, tents, and howitzers to blow up in fiery balls of fire.
13. High school graduation scenes from 1985 are just as lame as high school graduations from today.
14. A PG-13 rating can be achieved by simply plugging in expletives every other word spoken by the high school protagonist.
15. I really, really, really want a Hades bomb for Christmas.
16. 1 F-16 can bring an entire country to its knees economically and militarily.
17. Computers in the 80s were really, really bad.
18. Lamar from "Revenge of the Nerds" did have an acting career outside of his role in the Nerds movies after all!
19. When the Middle Eastern leader in the Mig says "Time to Die, Iron Eagle!", that is your cue that the Middle Eastern leader is about to die.
20. Blowing up $100 million worth of oil is really cool when you do it while playing "One Vision" on your boot-legged Sony Walkman.
21. It sucks that the iPod wasn't invented in the 1980s, because Doug Masters could really, really use one on his mission.
22. Chappy can see into the future in terms of his pre-recorded message to Doug that is played after Chappy goes down.
23. Arabs will knowingly drive motorcycles and trucks through a giant wall of fire on a runway instead of driving around the giant wall of fire to get to the American infidel invaders.
24. The little brother always plays the comic relief role in 80s movies, much like in "Sixteen Candles" and "Better Off Dead".
25. People who aren't in the Air Force can use the simulators, fly F-16s, borrow F-16s from air force bases, order in-flight refueling, and take matters into their own hands as long as their dad is being held by an evil Muslim regime.
reply
share
freyw
16 years ago
1. Enemy guided missiles are so poorly made, that four of them can be fired at you, and all you have to do to evade them is climb and bank to the right. Either that, or pilots in the Middle East like to fight with unguided rockets instead of guided missiles.
2. In the Middle East, external fuel tanks are so expensive and hard to find, that you never drop them, even when going into combat with a more agile opponent.
3. When American pilots have the oppurtunity to run, they don't take it, even when they're out-numbered to two or three to one.
4. American pilots (Air Force, anyway; the dialogue in the Top Gun dogfight seemed tighter) are very chatty, even in the middle of a life-or-death furball.
reply
share