MovieChat Forums > Star Wars: Episode I - The Phantom Menace (1999) Discussion > I knew something was wrong within about ...

I knew something was wrong within about two minutes...

posted 9 years ago by JakeHelmer
34 replies | jump to latest

Went to see this in '99. Had huge expectations. Within a couple minutes something felt seriously off. I couldn't quit explain it at the time, but I knew this wasn't a Star Wars movie.

It was wooden, empty, soulless. The characters had no depth, whether they were main characters or those with only one or two lines of dialogue. The characters weren't real people in a real world. The characters were just there to deliver uninspiring, expository dialogue. There was no story. It didn't grab my attention at all. The movie fell distant, as if you were looking though the wrong end of binoculars.

There was no sense of adventure and fun. Then they introduce us to the bungling trade confederation guys and my brother and I look at each other and wonder if this is actually happening. Is this really happening right now? Is this some kind of joke Lucas is playing on us? Then the atrocious CGI kicks in and I sit in the theater stunned that my favorite childhood franchise has been butchered. The magic was gone.

Well, that's all.

[–] SCY385-1 9 years ago

The movie was boring. It was just too damned long to be so boring. Then there is Natalie Portman's acting. She may have won an Oscar for Black Swan but she should have gotten a Razzie for this movie. It was like watching an overdressed puppet. It literally looked like somebody had their hand up her butt making her talk. The movie didn't work for me at all.

[–] whitemarkk7 8 years ago

...I'd like to have my hand up her butt... 😳

[–] donj79 8 years ago

Me too 😓

[–] CakesAndAle 8 years ago

I thought Portman's acting was better in I than it was in II or III.

[–] lm362 9 years ago

Please elaborate. How is it the characters had no depth? How was there no story? Did you not find the Pod race exciting and fun? There was plenty of adventure in the fighting and battle scenes.

"Do All Things For God's Glory"-1 Corinthians 10:31
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[–] alexcregan1998 8 years ago

There's nothing to elaborate on because they have no depth. There's too many factors to spoil the fun in this movie.

[–] lrdcharlton 8 years ago

Exactly, I don't understand people who do not picked anything wrong from the films.

[–] ComicNerd 8 years ago

Please elaborate. How is it the characters had no depth? How was there no story? Did you not find the Pod race exciting and fun? There was plenty of adventure in the fighting and battle scenes.

The podrace is a good hour into the movie. I agree with the OP, the movie was off from the beginning. The first time the Jedi start talking it's weird exposition. The pacing was completely off too, everyone talks about how urgent it is to get the Naboo city but it's all played so lackadaisical. Obi Wan and Quigon are flying through the planet's core like they are going on a Sunday drive and don't react to the giant monsters.

The podrace and the final lightsaber battle are the only times the movie has any life in it.

[–] lm362 8 years ago

It is just telling a story slowly instead of fast. I enjoyed that because I could think about what was happening. I enjoy the old sci-fi movies and these remind me of that.

"Do All Things For God's Glory"-1 Corinthians 10:31
I try doing this with my posts

[–] ComicNerd 8 years ago

The problem with the Pod Race is that up until the crew get to Tatooine they are on an urgent mission to get back to Coruscant, once they hit the desert the pace just slows to a crawl. There is no sense of urgency to get off the planet.

The pod race looks cool but serves very little purpose, almost all of the main characters are given nothing to do only watch a kid we had only just met race around a track. I think the pod race for the most part is well done visually. It's the stuff cut into the race , like the stupid 2 headed announcer, the weird looking cgi cartoon racer, Anakin's bad acting friends and the close ups of Jake Lloyd pressing buttons, he doesn't seem to have an direction on what he supposed to be doing.

[–] Mr_Beale 8 years ago

The problem with the Pod Race is that up until the crew get to Tatooine they are on an urgent mission to get back to Coruscant, once they hit the desert the pace just slows to a crawl. There is no sense of urgency to get off the planet.

Once they hit the desert planet they're stuck there, and their situation is so dire they place their fate in the hands of a 9-year-old kid. Seems the sense of urgency came in pretty strong to me.

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[–] ComicNerd 8 years ago

Once they hit the desert planet they're stuck there, and their situation is so dire they place their fate in the hands of a 9-year-old kid. Seems the sense of urgency came in pretty strong to me.

I just don't think it works , it's already established that Tatooine is full of criminals, so if the mission was that urgent they could have chartered a ship. I don't have an issue with them being stuck on Tatooine, it just ends up being a lame broken part.

It's hard to get invested in the urgency of the situation of everyone is just walking around like there is nothing at stake.

[–] Mr_Beale 8 years ago

if the mission was that urgent they could have chartered a ship.

With what? Republic credits? It's established their resources aren't particularly useful there.

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[–] ComicNerd 8 years ago

The Republic credits weren't any good for Watto, but I'm sure there would have been some other smugglers who could use those credits.

Which brings me to another issue with the movie, somehow Tatooine is on the outer rim but Quigon and crew can get there from Naboo without hyperspace.

[–] Volley2020 8 years ago

Yeah that's something that doesn't make sense either. It's incredibly doubtful the Tatooine system is anywhere near the Naboo system. Naboo is in the mid-rim of the galaxy. There would have been dozens of systems much closer to Naboo and much friendlier folk.

So I suspect they were able to make one small jump to Tatooine as it fit the navacomputers capabilities, they certainly would not have been able to make the trip at sublight speeds.

[–] ComicNerd 8 years ago

Which is why I don't buy that no one on Tatooine would want Republic Credits, if they are so close there has to be pilots who go back and forth.

[–] upl2229 8 years ago

There would have been dozens of systems much closer to Naboo and much friendlier folk.

The Trade Federation would've had a presence on those systems.

"Have to say, Jimmy - you turned into a real impressive fighter. If I was ol' Mengsk, I'd be runnin' scared from you, too."
"You really mean that, Tychus?"
"Nah. I was just kiddin'."

[–] Schmendrick 8 years ago

I don't think they wanted to trust anybody seedy to take them to Coruscant. Remember that Queen Amidala was being hunted.

[–] upl2229 8 years ago

Which brings me to another issue with the movie, somehow Tatooine is on the outer rim but Quigon and crew can get there from Naboo without hyperspace.

Do you, by any chance, have the same issue with the Millennium Falcon getting to Bespin from the Anoat system without a hyperdrive?

"Have to say, Jimmy - you turned into a real impressive fighter. If I was ol' Mengsk, I'd be runnin' scared from you, too."
"You really mean that, Tychus?"
"Nah. I was just kiddin'."

[–] ComicNerd 8 years ago

Do you, by any chance, have the same issue with the Millennium Falcon getting to Bespin from the Anoat system without a hyperdrive?

I didn't have an issue with this because there isn't anything in the movie that indicates that these places are far away. Tatooine was supposed to be on the outer rim far from civilization but it's right next to Naboo supposedly which is a major player in the Republic.

[–] lm362 8 years ago

I think the pod race serves the following purpose: When you see the grown Anakin operating what he flies in(can't remember what they are called), your mind goes back to young Anakin in the pod race. You see that the older Anakin is still good at what he does, like he did when he was in the pod race.

"Do All Things For God's Glory"-1 Corinthians 10:31
I try doing this with my posts

[–] Kruleworld 8 years ago

by ComicNerd
Obi Wan and Quigon are flying through the planet's core like they are going on a Sunday drive and don't react to the giant monsters.

Possibly because they are sitting in a giant green room and told to 'look scared'. It's all very well to use cg effects and all that, but you need good actors and good directors to pull it off. i'm pretty sure Liam Neeson and Ewan McGreggor are good actors that are 'phoning it in'.

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[–] Mr_Beale 8 years ago

Obi Wan and Quigon are flying through the planet's core like they are going on a Sunday drive and don't react to the giant monsters.

For us, flying through a planet core is a wonder we can only dream of. But for them, it's Tuesday.

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[–] xenopharb 8 years ago

For us, flying through a planet core is a wonder we can only dream of. But for them, it's Tuesday.

We can only dream of it because it could not happen. Crush depth would be a small fraction of the length of that journey. George Lucas would have done well to add a little more science into his science fiction.

[–] upl2229 8 years ago

Crush depth would be a small fraction of the length of that journey.

And there's no sound in space.

George Lucas would have done well to add a little more science into his science fiction.

Star Wars isn't science fiction.

"Have to say, Jimmy - you turned into a real impressive fighter. If I was ol' Mengsk, I'd be runnin' scared from you, too."
"You really mean that, Tychus?"
"Nah. I was just kiddin'."

[–] Schmendrick 8 years ago

I think it's because the Jedi are not supposed to be very excitable people. They're supposed to be mostly calm and controlled, though not completely stoic like a samurai. I think it's more akin to a priest or a bishop when he's on the clock (no pedophile jokes, please :-|).

[–] xenopharb 8 years ago

Did you not find the Pod race exciting and fun?

No.

The pod race was nothing more than an episode of Wacky Races. I almost expected Dick Dastardly to show up. It was unrealistic, was a mockery of the Star Wars universe, and had a winner that was a foregone conclusion. It was a waste of screen time.

There was plenty of adventure in the fighting and battle scenes.

Which part of the battle scenes did you enjoy? Was it the foolish Gungans or the idiotic droids? Who puts an army in an open field without cover and literally waits for the opposing force to unload and form ranks? Add Jar Jar Binks to that, and it is game over.

[–] Volley2020 8 years ago

I didn't notice anything wrong until the Battle Droid said "check it out corporal, we'll cover you" and the other droid says "roger roger".

It seemed very strange to insert that, but okay whatever, short scene and straight to some awesome lightsaber action, Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon trying to get into the bridge--GREAT Lightsaber scene with Qui-Gon, and even Force Speed which until that point I had only seen in Dark Forces II Jedi Knight for Windows 95.

But I suppose the moment I realized something was very very wrong, was when Jar Jar showed up and attempted to talk to Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan, and I could hardly understand what he was saying, and he was saying "meesa" and and just acting like a clutz as well as that ridiculous force-jump style dive into the water, just before heading to the Gungan city.

That further escalated with Anakin's "woah" and "yippeee" on Tatooine... /cry

Then I knew something was very wrong.

[–] 8 years ago

[deleted]

[–] davywap 8 years ago

but I knew this wasn't a Star Wars movie

yeah sorry but this is a star wars movie

There was no sense of adventure and fun

There was lightsaber crap going on within 5 minutes 

my favorite childhood franchise has been butchered. The magic was gone.

how does not liking this movie affect how you feel about the OT?

Some of your rationale is dumb, but should've come to expect this from PT haters over the last 17 years.

Star Wars is like pizza, even when it's bad it's still pretty good.

[–] rp69 8 years ago

I saw the original trilogy in theaters in the 1970-80's, and saw Phantom Menace on video when it came out. You nailed it. In the first 5 minutes, I knew this was not up to OT standards. Not even RotJ, the worst of the OT. First it started with a bunch of boring, inner workings dialogue that I really didn't understand, nor care about. Then we're introduced to JarJar Binks, A moronic out of place cartoon character with an even more out of place Jamaican accent. Then a very childish child takes over the show. RotJ got a little childish with Jaba and the cuddly Ewoks. Then Phantom Menace picked that theme up and really ran with it, introducing us to JarJar and all those other silly desert creatures(like the Jewish junkyard owner), then the Whining kid and a prepubescent Padme.

I have to disagree with you about the movie having no story. Besides being a kiddie movie, it's other main problem is TOO MUCH story, and boring dialogue. Mind numbing scenery chewing.

I never saw Clone Wars, but I remember the negative buzz at the time. I reluctantly wound up seeing Revenge of the Sith with friends. I remember thinking the series was getting back on track, with enough action, and no silly characters or children. But it was still mired in dense uninteresting story. It was OK.

I just saw Force Awakens today. It's a very good movie. It's definitely a rehash of New Hope, no doubt about that. But it felt right. A very simple, straight forward story. Just enough to keep the movie going and justify the action. No kids, no completely ridiculous cartoon characters.
I await the next installment.

[–] baronofspades 8 years ago

OK. First of all i disagree with pretty much everything you wrote. Lets start with the characters. You say the characters had no depth. That they were not real people in a real world. What do you define as character with depth? Also you do realise that we are talking about a galaxy far far away right? Its a fantasy movie. Please explain what you mean in more detail. Personally i had no problem with the characters.

2nd. You say there was no story. I strongly disagree. There was a story. The story was the event that lead to Palpatine becoming supreme Chancellor and that lead to the meeting between Obi-Wan,Anakin and Padme. Plus the introduction of one of the experiences that lead Anakin to the Dark Side [his past as a slave].

No sense of adventure and fun you say. I saw plenty of that with the scenery, the explosions, the lightsaber battles, the pod race and the music.

Bungling trade condederation guys. Yes they were a bit dum but you can pretty much say the same for every individual that got Force Choked by Vader. Plus they were mere greedy pawns in a larger game.

As for the CGI. I saw nothing wrong with it.

The movie isnt perfect. None of the Star Wars movies is. However i wouldnt say that it butchered the universe created by the OT. I would say that it properly expanded it.

[–] !!!deleted!!! (50578328) 8 years ago

There was a story all right. A mind-numbingly tedious story about trade negotiations and embargoes. Everything guaranteed to spark the interest of a young child, the target audience.

[–] upl2229 8 years ago

There was a story all right. A mind-numbingly tedious story about trade negotiations and embargoes.

That's like saying A New Hope had a story about farming.

"Have to say, Jimmy - you turned into a real impressive fighter. If I was ol' Mengsk, I'd be runnin' scared from you, too."
"You really mean that, Tychus?"
"Nah. I was just kiddin'."