Have the french ever won anything?

Have the French won a war? That's a good question. Undoubtedly Charles Martel saved Europe from the Moors, but that is ancient history. But lets look at the wars France has fought in the last few hundred years since say 1750...

* Seven Years War. 1754 - 1762. Thrashed by Britain on four continents (Arguably the first world wide war)
* Napoleonic Wars. 1803 - 1814. Beaten by Britain and others, notably Prussia and Russia
* The Hundred Days. 1815. Napoleon was beaten by the Duke of Wellington.
* Crimean War 1853 - 1856. French units fared poorly but British, Ottoman & Sardinian forces beat the Russians
* Franco Prussian War. 1870. France utterly thrashed in a couple of weeks.
* World War I. 1914 - 1918. Bailed out by the Brits and their Empire troops who eventually won.
* World War II. 1939 - 1840. Surrendered a few weeks after Hitler dipped his toe in their Vichy water
* Vietnam c.1950 - 1955. Beaten by irregular forces in the field also beaten by a formal army at Dien Bien Phu
* Algerian War. 1954 - 1962. Soundly beaten by local Arabs and Berbers.

So it appears that the French have lost every war they have been involved in since 1750 except on the few occasions when they have been assisted by Britain.

Yes:

"Fastest largest standing army in the world to fall apart and collapse in the shortest time."

This occurred during the Germans' French vacation, May-June 1940

..Joe

I think they've won in figure skating.

Nah, they were a bunch of cheese eatin' surrender monkies!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yZUKEVU-TwM

😎

They fought like hell in ww1, amid all kinds of horror.

That depends on their own history. They've lost a lot of international wars, but if you look into wars they fought in their own backyard, they did have a few victories here and there.

hastings 1066