MovieChat Forums > Lars and the Real Girl (2007) Discussion > Am I the only one who doesn't get the hy...

Am I the only one who doesn't get the hype?


With such a stretch of a topic, I am surprised everyone seems to love this movie so much. I have seen a lot less of a movie stir up a lot more debate on IMDB message boards....

But I just don't get it. I enjoyed it on a somewhat entertaining level, I guess, but overall it just didn't click with me. I found it a little uncomfortable that EVERYONE in the town completely went along with it. There are a lot of ways to show compassion to loved ones without living in a delusional-touched world. If anything, I do not think it is healthy to enable crazy behaviors like this. You can help a loved one get the help they need and also live in reality.

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This wasn't a movie about a guy who thinks a doll is real. This was about not judging people. It was about going the distance for love, for faith, for friendship, for community. It was about healing from trauma in unconventional ways, and looking beneath the surface for ways to understand one another and reach out-- for help, and TO help. It was about control and forgiveness and bravery--however those manifest. It was about family, how we can come through some terrible *beep* and be ourselves without forgetting or "prettying" the past. I got much more out of this movie than the awkward laughs in the beginning, so I'm just saying. You're free to take what you got, and leave the rest. I only hope I can have --and be!-- a community like this someday.

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This wasn't a movie about a guy who thinks a doll is real. This was about not judging people. It was about going the distance for love, for faith, for friendship, for community. It was about healing from trauma in unconventional ways, and looking beneath the surface for ways to understand one another and reach out-- for help, and TO help. It was about control and forgiveness and bravery--however those manifest. It was about family, how we can come through some terrible *beep* and be ourselves without forgetting or "prettying" the past. I got much more out of this movie than the awkward laughs in the beginning, so I'm just saying. You're free to take what you got, and leave the rest. I only hope I can have --and be!-- a community like this someday.


+1. Very well said.

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It was clearly about all of those things, but the premise was simply too distractingly false to really have it work. Everyone would love to live in a community like that that would basically set aside their lives to cater to one very sweet, but delusion individual, but the fact is that that community does not exist, never will, and really never should outside of such egocentric fantasies as this film.

I for one found a lot of the relationships to be thoroughly dysfunctional, especially the one with the office girl who is so desperately lonely she is willing to not only overlook the fact that her would be boyfriend is deeply emotionally damaged, and very likely incapable of having a healthy regular relationship with an actual woman, but also to accept to have his feelings for her placed under his love for the memory of a sex doll.

It's not a good message.

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Agreed. SLKneeland is way to idealistic (which says a LOT coming from me) and doomed to a life of misery and frustration.

That said, if you want to experience this story on a more *realistic* level, pick up a book called Pobby and Dingan (which was later made into a movie called Opal Dream which I haven't seen). In it, the story is played out on the level of family and not through the entire community (i.e. in a plausible way). And being a children's book, it's so much more powerful.

LATRG is simply contrived nonsense.




That's the most you'll ever get out of me Wordman. Ever. -Eddie Wilson

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If that WAS the message, it wouldn't be a good one. But the whole point of the movie was that Lars, with the love and support of his family and community, had subconsciously used "Bianca" to heal himself, so that he WAS capable of having a healthy regular relationship with Margo. As for Margo's attitude, I don't agree that she "overlooked" the fact that Lars was damaged; she knew that, but saw the sweetness and compassion underneath and hoped that the damage could be healed.

As for the "distractingly false" premise, I don't think it's that unrealistic that a circle of family, friends, co-workers, and church members in a small town would go to unusual lengths to support one of their own. Was it idealized, exaggerated for comic and dramatic effect? Yeah, maybe. But to me, that just made it a charming fable.

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I obviously don't think that's the message the film was TRYING to make, but I would argue, with good cause, I think, that they failed to deliver their intended message if you make any attempt at an honest critique of the particulars.

I understand this movie is just a quirky fantasy, and I understand what the movie was going for, and how they expected I would feel, but for me personally they pushed my suspension of disbelief to the breaking point pretty rapidly, and the "happy" ending of some poor woman accepting her place as second fiddle to the memory of a literally objectified woman, is to me, rather misogynistic and highly absurd.

I honestly think the main reason people are ok with this movie is that ole Young Hercules is very attractive, and charismatic. If it was say, Steve Buscemi that had fallen in love with a sex doll I think most people would have found it weird, and absurd and creepy.

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Obviously I do not think this was just a movie about a guy thinking a doll was real. Who says because you want to help a loved one in the appropriate way means you are judging them? Loving someone and not judging them doesn't mean you go along with their world. My entire point of the original post was that it was hurting him to completely go along with it. His loved ones should approach this as a family matter and support and love him the way that family members should...never once did I say anything about judging him. I understand the point of this movie, trust me. My point is that if the writers wanted to get this point across they should have shown only his family helping him and defending him. By having the entire town go along with it weakened the point.

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it's a fictional movie, not a how-to guide for addressing psychological disorders


Who cares about stairs? The main thing is ice cream.

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ahh so your point is that movies are solely just movies and they shouldn't make you think, wonder and internalize anything? If that were the case everyone would just fulfill their viewing experience by mind numbing "reality shows" because those are just as fictional. This movie is an indie black comedy..a major point of these movies is to make you think...not only enjoy it for its fictional purpose.

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Think, wonder, internalize...all are desirable manifestations of the mind's engagement with cinema

my point is I don't think that loving a fictional narrative film is predicated on there being any characters that make choices, or exhibit behaviors, that would be considered to be healthy in reality. and I certainly don't wonder how people can think highly of films that are uncomfortably delusional

the opportunity to internalize unrealistic worldviews and unhealthy values, and to cognitize them on a temporary basis, without having to live with delusions of our own, is one of the greatest things that fiction offers us

realistic fiction also provides valuable, enriching opportunities, however, by imposing realism, comfort, and health as general criteria for the full appreciation of fiction, one defines a standard that is unreasonably close to that of an instructional text, negating the key strengths of imaginative storytelling

I don't take issue with the fact that the film didn't happen to click with you. it didn't do a lot for me either, mainly because I found it neither funny, nor especially thought provoking. the response from viewers of the film is much more interesting than the film itself


They'll hang you as sure as 10 dimes will buy a dollar

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worthless gibberish

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Some people require an alternate reality to fit in. They struggle adapting to a real world in a traditional sense so need a surreal experience to attempt to relate to it in their own way.

The Beaver was exactly the same as this... in fact I consider it a carbon copy (made 4 years after) where Mel Gibson needs a stuffed beaver to relate to his family, friends, and business.

People do this all the time with certain things. Maybe not to the extreme, but they do it. Some drink alcohol, do drugs, play video games, role play, etc. It's all a way to escape reality in a way and fill a social/personal need to a degree. Everyone has a quirk.. some men hit women, some women get pregnant as quick as possible to feel loved/needed regardless of marriage.

It all just comes down to what is socially acceptable and the town did a good job of accepting his quirk. Funny how alcohol, nicotine, pregnancy, etc. are all socially acceptable but having a relationship with a doll is not. Go figure. Not that I'd be a person to ever get a doll (just not my thing really lol) but I 'get it'.

I was actually a little disappointed by the end *SPOILERS* that he wound up talking to the girl and likely starting a real relationship and didn't end up getting another doll and showing him being a happy person with his nephew and town folks etc. That the doll and that life was what he found to be the fulfilling nature to his happiness. Is that a weird lifestyle? To you and I, but some might think popping out 10 kids, getting married, and worshipping God 24/7 is just as weird.


People get caught up FAR too much in socially accepted behavior and forget to remember it's what makes a person happy end of day (assuming it doesn't harm others) and as long as they can look int he mirror and say, "I'm happy." everyone else can piss off as far as I'm concerned.

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It was fine. The premise was too silly to carry the (fairly insipid) message of the film in my opinion, but the actors and the solid production were good enough to keep it watchable, but it was very difficult to connect

I gave it a 5/10. Watchable, but I wouldn't recommend it.

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I know what you're saying. I mean, it's like in Lord of the Rings when the ring had this control over the characters,...pfff,..like it had its own energy. Well everyone knows a ring could never have that type of power...it was totally obvious.

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Ha very clever, I see what you did there. I have many points to say back but I will not dignify your troll like response with an answer.

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Oh yes, a troll is someone pointing out how ridiculous your criticism of a fictional story was.... In a sarcastic way. You sound like an unpleasant *beep*

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Thank you....coming from you I most definitely take that as a compliment!

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There is an absolute endearing sweetness to this movie that is sadly missing in our world often. That "hype" as you call it, I can totally get behind. From the script, direction, the ensemble cast, and most especially Ryan Gosling, this movie is hopeful and touching in the most genuine of ways.

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You either get this movie or you don't. I'm not being simplistic here. There's obviously a willing suspension of disbelief that you have to make or you won't appreciate this film. I, for one, loved it even more on a second viewing than on the first because I could focus on how beautifully the writer, the director, and the very talented actors, especially Ryan Gosling, maintained a core of reality in the midst of the absurdity.

But Lars and the Real is not for the cynical at heart.

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Maybe it didn't click for you, but it did for me. I heard about it from a lot of people and thought it was over hyped. When I heard about the premise, I thought it was going to be some raunchy thing. But it was touching and kind and got me right in the heart.

I would correct you in that not everyone in the movie does go along--note the two guys in the hospital staring at Lars and Bianca and the nurse has to go and shut the door. Gus can't call Bianca by name, so you know he struggles. We don't see the whole town. We see a circle of people who love Lars, so it is a limited set.

As for how crazy the premise is, I am a pastor and was a chaplain in a nursing home in which there had been one or two people who thought a doll was a real child of theirs. It was touching how many people would go along with them--not just staff and residents, but visitors--to bring comfort to people who were obviously in a different place from the rest of us. We even held a baptism for one doll because it meant so much to her "mother." Would my church body condone that? No. But pastoral kindness does. It did not preclude giving proper care to the person involved, but there are times you just enter their reality and love them there instead of demanding they return to ours.

I showed this film to the people in my nursing home, and they loved it. They knew it wasn't meant to be realistic, but to paint a picture of the best of human kindness and maybe inspire us all a little to be more kind to one another.

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