1. Drive by shooting on the red carpet
2. Run by prison shanking during the award presentation
3. Knockout game on a presenter
4. Looting a random section of the audience
5. Burning down the venue with a “mostly peaceful” protest
Cast your vote now!
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...All the above, but hosted by a holographic George Floyd and punctuated with performances by Snoop, Cardi B & Megan Thee Stallion (and perhaps a tasteful halftime 'Savage X Fenty' catwalk display?) Just as long as the Academy trot out Anthony Hopkins after each (and every) indignity, to (insincerely) say something mildly profound-ish.
Although He (and any other whites, lucky/brave/thirsty enough to be invited) would all have to take a cerimonial Knee and beg for forgiveness (an exonoration that's about as likely to happen as black people EVER accepting responsibilty for their own actions)
Now that's what I call 'Progress'
Witty good-natured jokes and banter, followed by awards given out to high-quality films and performances based on their merit, and then accepted gracefully without pretension or self-aggrandizement.
That would shock the hell out of me.
I'd be shocked as well.
shareI'm so old I remember when it was just like that. It was fun to watch, in spite of the occasional fake native American girl activist or angry Susan Sarandon tossed in.
shareMy heart would probably stop from the shock.
shareI'd like to see Ricky Gervais as the host, totally unrestrained and uncensored.
shareThe program not being broadcast at all.
shareMore wardrobe malfunctions!!!
shareAll of the above.
shareJakie Chan fly kicking Chris Tucker.
share