Guaranteed ways to win an Oscar!
Here is a list of ways to almost guarantee that a star, movie etc will win the golden statue, or at least an Oscar nomination.
Feel free to add to this list....
-If you make a war film which is anti-war
-If you play a gay character
-If you play a gay character dressed in drag.
-If you make a film dealing with an "issue".
-If you are in a superhero film, you will not win one, unless you die soon after, and the Academy try to make up for not giving it to you for gay kissing a cowboy.
-If you are mates with George Clooney
-If you are a young star who has recently appeared in a franchise film (Jennifer Lawrence, Bradley Cooper)but it won't be for that franchise film.
-If you play an old fart on screen.
-If you are an old fart off screen.
-If you are the elite of Hollywood, you will get at least one Oscar in your career, often not for your best film, but because you are due.
-If you "old Hollywood", unless your name is Peter O'Toole.
-You will score an Oscar nomination, no matter how bad the movie is, if your name is Meryl Streep.
-If your name is Daniel Day-Lewis.
-If you play a character with an affliction of any type. Hell, even James Coburn won an Oscar simply for appearing in a film called "Affliction".
-If you are Daniel Day-Lewis and play a character with an affliction.
-You will win Best Song every time if your name is Randy Newman, and your song is from a Disney or Pixar film.
-If you are Steven Spielberg, you will get a nomination for a movie which is a historic film, and not based on aliens, sharks, gremlins, goonies, or adventurous archeologists (in other words, if you are a sell-out).
-If you are in the Screen Actors Guild (which is why Gary Oldman never wins, because he isn't).
-If your name is Leonardo DiCaprio, you are guaranteed NOT to win one.
-If you are a young star under 15, and either go around the bend (Tatum O'Neal), or continue your career appearing in a TV show about vampires (Anna Paquin).
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