MovieChat Forums > Reality Bites (1994) Discussion > She Chose The Wrong Partner!

She Chose The Wrong Partner!

posted 17 years ago by Swill_Merchant
55 replies | jump to latest

the Ethan Hawke character was an abusive, self-destructive, substance-addicted, neurotic, selfish loser, and a jerk to everyone around him. Ben Stiller's character was a normal, functioning human adult: morally compromised and corrupt--that is to say, alive. To step into the circle of life is to choose not to be pure, whether you are Gandhi or Donald Trump. I tried to tell this to some younger people that I saw the film with and needless to say, I got from the MTV generation nothing but hostile stares. What can you expect from a group whose aim is to revive the worst music and fashions of this century?

[–] dobbin-4 17 years ago

I totally agree Ben Stillers chracter is way better the Ethan Hawke chracter. It is the only thing I did not like about the film.

[–] wraggio 17 years ago

it symbolizes the generation, though

and when you're 22 you always go after someone like that rather than the safe choice, don't you?

[–] daburgundy 13 years ago

Damn right! maybe if they lift Troy's character a little better i think we wouldn't feel this way. Lelaina will have another and bigger bite with Troy! poor girl! there is a bit sexism or its just me? :(

[–] Squelchy 17 years ago

Michael sells out her concept to the production company?

[–] ldddhunter 17 years ago

She has more passion with the Ethan Hawke character, I think.

[–] i_justius 17 years ago

Its cool. In two years they will break up and she will be on the look out for Ben Stiller types. Troy will work at Starbucks stealing muffins.

[–] lei3 16 years ago

can't help who you fall for unfortunately...

"An entire generation of Cinderellas and there's no glass slipper coming..." - Almost Famous

[–] MrAleisterCrowley 15 years ago

Exactly. This is what I realize now, sixteen years after seeing the movie when it first came out. Choosing the Ethan Hawke character shows her incredible immaturity -- their relationship won't last more than a year at the most, and all the pomp and circumstance of his adopted "broken-genius philosopher type who couldn't even finish college because he is oh-so brilliant" persona will grow extremely tiresome once it wears off. Now that I have been out in the world for awhile, I see his character as the very annoying, totally self-centered, immature, and needy jerk that he is -- the illusion fails.

Now I see that the Ben Stiller character is -- just as he says at one point -- capable of loving and supporting (emotionally as well as financially, which can't be overrated) the Winona Ryder character in a way that "Troy" will NEVER understand. Unfortunately she didn't recognize this fact due to her inexperience.

[–] 15 years ago

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[–] theunabashedsycophant 17 years ago

They loved each other but were *both* too immature to admit it. So you got one guy who is brave, smart, but too rebellious, and another who is cowardly, not so smart, but endearing. As endearing as Ben was...he was sort of a tool. She was young and wanted somebody on her level, not afraid to be young and dumb and stupid with her. Even though Ethan's character had flaws, he didn't give her whatever she wanted, he didn't always let her have her way, and he stood for everything she believed in at the time...unlike Ben.

[–] 17 years ago

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[–] morgan-claire-h 15 years ago

Yeah, I completely agree with you, Troy was right in the end!

[–] iamfinethx 16 years ago

wow look at you gettin all lion king on them.
i would have chosen ben stiller's character because he was actually nice and caring. i didn't feel chemistry between ethan hawke and winona. or maybe i've been watching too many romantic comedies.

[–] frickonastickwithabrick 16 years ago

She chose the guy that she was right with, it doesn't mean the guy she is right with is a total catch.

"yea babe when i die, you're not invited to my funeral *kiss* "

[–] nikkiPC 16 years ago

WOW, a man doesn't know how to spell woman. shocker!

[–] JDRamone 16 years ago

Michael is being defended over Troy mostly on the basis that he is nicer and more polite. But here's something no one has acknowledged.

How many of us truly get to do what we want for a career? Most of us have to settle for a "joe job" just to pay the bills. It's like that line in Office Space: "Peter, most people don't like their jobs."

Lelaina's dream is to be a documentary filmmaker. She tries to achieve this by making a documentary about her friend's lives that was honest and had integrity. Michael showed this to his bosses and they bought it to be shown on their network. She then finds out that they turned her work into a bunch of crass sex jokes and product placements.

While Michael did later offer to pitch her version of the documentary to his bosses, it was an empty gesture as they were the ones who changed it in the first place. Of course they wouldn't accept the original version or they wouldn't have ruined it to begin with.

No matter how "nice" and "polite" someone is, could you live with someone who killed your dream?

"Well I've got one shot and the night is young/So don't wait up for me"--The Donnas

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[–] nikkiPC 16 years ago

yeah :)

[–] ms-catamaran 16 years ago

oh i know! i was just watching it and said that out loud to myself-- Ethan Hawke's character has that whole dirty grungey flannel wearing thing going on, plus he takes himself WAY too seriously and Michael (Ben Stiller) is sweet, funny in a dorky way, really good looking, and probably bathed in the last week..

[–] JDRamone 16 years ago

See, this is exactly what I'm talking about! The reasons given for preferring Michael are almost completely superficial, and no acknowledgement of the fact that he totally screwed Lelaina over!

Do you people understand what happened in this film, or do you need the Cliffs Notes version?

"Well I've got one shot and the night is young/So don't wait up for me"--The Donnas

[–] ms-catamaran 16 years ago

I understand completely but I also think it was a mistake, unintentional, something his good intentions couldn't fix, yes he did screw her over, either because he didn't have enough backbone to stop it or he wasn't smart enough to see it coming and realize it wouldn't please her. Everyone make mistakes, big ******* mistakes.

[–] tellerofthetruth 13 years ago

Do you realise that Troy tried to intimidate Leilana and was abusive? He would make fun of her, stepped out in front of her after they had that big fight to not let her pass to intimidate her, and was a total *beep*

"I am not worried, Harry...I am with you."

[–] steph2241 16 years ago

Hey, Id choose Troy over Michael every time. I had a guy like Michael, a spineless, clingy tool dressed in punk clothing who will eventually grow up to be a tool in a business suit with 4 kids and a pink house in the burbs. No thanks! A woman of intelligence and passion will never be happy with a man like that. Its no adventure, and it really drives you to the brink of insanity, in my experience.

If I wanted to marry my father, I guess I would choose Michael....