First off I loved this movie so much - I'm not even sure why but it was one of the funnier movies I've seen in a while.
The part I laughed hardest at was when Ethan (Galifianakas) walks up to the pickup truck after RDJ calls him over post-ranting on him and trying to leave with Jamie Foxx.
Ethan goes, "Are you ready to apologize yet?"
RDJ "WHAT? *beep* YOU!"
The way he delivered that line was so friggen hilarious idk why I lost it.
Laughed? You are a retard!
shareThe scene where Downy Jr punches the kid in the stomach
The scene where Downy Jr spits in the dogs face (funniest part of the movie by far)
The scene where Ethan thinks Shakespeare is a famous pirate
Both Peter's wife and Darrell's initial reaction to Ethan. "Oh my God!", "Oh wow"
Ethan's gay actor, hollywood strutt to the pickup truck
All too funny
When he punches the kid in the stomach.
I swear, I was in the same situation once.
A little girl pissed me off just like that and when I told her dad about it, he laughed at me.
I so wanted to kick his ass in front of his daughter, but that would have been messy.
I really enjoyed this scene.
"That's so funny! My dad would never do that, he loved me."
"If you're allergic to waffles, than don't eat waffles!"
"Than don't take me to a Wafflehouse!"
"Why are your father's ashes in a coffee can?"
"Because he's dead, Peter."
"That was Shakespeare. Ever head of him?"
"Yes, I've heard of him. He was a famous pirate. And it's 'Shake's Beard'."
"You better check yourself, before you wreck yourself."
"I'm sorry we drank your father."
"Oh, come on. You love him. You know you love him."
"I survived him. There's a difference."
"Maybe. Maybe not. Maybe fvck yourself." -- The Departed
These for me too (well quoted btw)
"That's so funny! My dad would never do that, he loved me."
"If you're allergic to waffles, than don't eat waffles!"
"Than don't take me to a Wafflehouse!"
"Why are your father's ashes in a coffee can?"
"Because he's dead, Peter."
"That was Shakespeare. Ever head of him?"
"Yes, I've heard of him. He was a famous pirate. And it's 'Shake's Beard'."
"You better check yourself, before you wreck yourself."
"I'm sorry we drank your father."
"Oh, come on. You love him. You know you love him."
"I survived him. There's a difference."
I can't quote word-for-word but I'd add:
"Yeah but why a coffee can?"
"Its the best thing there is - its freeze-dried and vacuum packed - says it on the label".
"...not because its in that can but.. once you opened it its not vacuum-packed anymore.. don't you get that?"
While eating Waffles and feeding the dog "hehe so funny... thinks he's people. He is so stupid!".
"I'm allergic to waffles"
(later) "and if you are allergic to waffles DON"T EAT WAFFLES"
"... Then you stop taking me to waffle houses!"
*punches obnoxious kid in stomach*
later when mom comes back to room, points at kid "You good? you good?" kid nods.
"I will have your husband home safely. ... say, do you know where I can get my perm touched up?
"A perm?"
"yeah, a 'Permanent'. It's permanent"
There are so many effing hilarious bits in this I had to find some online quotes to remember all my faves:
Ethan Tremblay: Well, we...we...we haven't been drinking. We had a split of six pack of forties but...you know what? My father always had a saying; "When a day starts like this it's all uphill from here.
Peter Highman: That's actually incorrect.
Ethan Tremblay: No. He...my dad, he said...
Peter Highman: Uphill? No, it's all downhill from here.
Ethan Tremblay: But everybody wants to be up, nobody wants to be down. So, it's all uphill from here.
Peter Highman: But it's easier as you go downhill. So your dad didn't know what the *beep* he was talking about.
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TSA Agent: you and your friend.
Peter Highman: Who?
TSA Agent: The gentleman I just interviewed.
Peter Highman: I've never seen that dip *beep* before in my life.
TSA Agent: Really?
Peter Highman: Yeah.
TSA Agent: He had nothing but nice things to say about you.
I loved how they kept saying 'you and your friend' ffs lol
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Ethan Tremblay: Look, I know we got off on the wrong foot, but I tell ya I have a really great personality once you get to know me.
Peter Highman: Yeah, I'm sure you do.
Ethan Tremblay: I got ninety friends on Facebook, twelve of them are pending, but I got ninety friends.
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Peter Highman: Tough business to break into. So competitive. I have a friend, he's...he's in that industry.
Ethan Tremblay: Does he work on Two and a Half Men?
Peter Highman: No. He um...
Ethan Tremblay: Well then that's too bad. Because Two and a Half Men is the reason I wanted to become an actor.
Peter Highman: Right.
Ethan Tremblay: Specially the second season.
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I don't remember it word-for-word but when he can't get the wire transfer because he was using his 'stage name' and trying to immerse himself into the character of 'Tremblay' which he thinks sounds like an actors name instead of his real name 'Chase'.
"Chase sounds like a movie star name. Tremblay sounds made-up!"
"Yeah - because I DID make it up.. don't you listen!"
(going from memory on that one)
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After he does a scene from the Godfather and dumb girl asks him 'Did you write that yourself?"
"No, the Mafia did"
"wow".
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Ethan Tremblay: Of course I'm an adult. I'm twenty three years old.
Peter Highman: You are the most shot-out twenty three year old I've ever seen. How have you made it this far? How have you not run yourself over in car?
Ethan Tremblay: I've done that.
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Peter Highman: A real actor is someone who can really act.
Ethan Tremblay: Well go ahead then, give me an action, give me a scene.
Peter Highman: I'm not gonna...no, I don't want to.
Ethan Tremblay: You should.
Peter Highman: Okay. I'm Julia Roberts...uh, you have terminal cancer, we're engaged. Break the news to me.
Ethan Tremblay: Julia Roberts, as you know we're engaged. I have terminal cancer.
[Peter stares at Ethan]
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Peter considering abandoning the fathers ashes on the side of the highway:
Peter Highman: You know, I just wanna offer an explanation, sir, as to why you wound up on the side of state 20. It's not your fault, it's your kid. He's an incredibly difficult person to travel with. In fact I don't know how or why you didn't just strangle him in the *beep* crib.
...
"Do you know who Shakespeare is?"
"of course, and by the way its 'Shakes Beard'"
..........
One that killed me was "Did you ejaculate?"
"What?"
"It's when urine turns white"
said with total scientific confidence lmfao!
After finding out they are drinking his dad in coffee form he habitually takes another slurp of dad-coffee was classic
Ethan Tremblay: At least he tasted good.
Peter Highman: Not bad. Yeah, strong. It was uh...full flavored, robust blend.
Ethan Tremblay: He really enjoyed coffee and in the end he was enjoyed as coffee. Circle of life.
Peter Highman: Lion King. All that.
Mistakenly got in line to cross the Mexico border. "I thought it said Texaco and we're low on gas".
For whatever reason that Mexican border guard (just everything) made me effing laugh and laugh. 'Your dog got glaucoma too?'
Ethan with ridiculous scarf making him look like a PLO terrorist hauling ass with the trailer, jackknifes and they stare at each other from the now opposing windows.
I hate to say it but Ethan shooting Peter made me laugh if only because it was so obviously stupid it was going to happen and then blatantly did exactly what you expected.
Classic comedy!
"That's so funny! My dad would never do that, he loved me."
"If you're allergic to waffles, than don't eat waffles!"
"Than don't take me to a Wafflehouse!"
"Why are your father's ashes in a coffee can?"
"Because he's dead, Peter."
"That was Shakespeare. Ever head of him?"
"Yes, I've heard of him. He was a famous pirate. And it's 'Shake's Beard'."
"You better check yourself, before you wreck yourself."
"I'm sorry we drank your father."
"Oh, come on. You love him. You know you love him."
"I survived him. There's a difference."
"Maybe. Maybe not. Maybe fvck yourself." -- The Departed
The part where the fat annoying retard with the beard was bouncing a few feet high in the back of Jamie Foxx's truck.
Douche deserved it. He is awesome at being annoying.
I see him in the street, I will sucker-punch him.
the whole part where RDJ gets shot in the leg till ZG pukes in it. i was laughing so much i had to rewind to catch the lines.
--Where the hell's the records room??--
"Aw, I thought it was a Texaco, we're almost out of gas.."
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"Get in the back seat Private, what are you a girl or something?" Had me in tears.
share"Dad... you were like a father to me" I laughed out loud.
The whole gun shot scene was pretty hilarious too.
p.s. I'm glad there is a thread actually celebrating the movie instead of a forum full of a bunch of dick heads saying "it sucked I want my money back."
I gave it a 7/10, not the best comedy ever but definitely worth seeing.
Nothing says funny like a masturbating dog. Awww now your *beep* dogs doing it! Ha ''What are you supposed to be? some kind of a cosmonauts?''...
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