Dumbshit in Covenant [by Stephen Ablett]
"Spoilers. This film is beyond stupid, it's a complete utter mess.
1. There is a ship full off over 1000 sleeping passengers. Yet they have one, just one android to look after it all. Why not have 3, 10 or even 20 androids! They don't age, and surely should one fail, you need a backup! Piloting an entire ship usually takes more than one person!
2. A rogue solar flare hits the ship disabling it. It goes unexplained. Combine that with the random stray video signal, and M-class planet that appears out of nowhere, you scream "It's a trap!" If anything, it would appear some sort of attack.
3. An astronaut outside the ship picks up a stray signal through his helmets two-way radio, that somehow appears in visual form on the glass of his helmet? Yet the giant ship with the radio dish right next to him misses it!
4. That stray signal apparently happens to be a song in English. Yet who transmitted it? How did you determine the artist from the white noise? What they found on the planet later no-way explains why they sent a song into space for no apparent reason!
5. They are able to trace a stray video signal to a planet two weeks away at star-ship speed. Where do I begin to show how stupid this is?
6. They don't want to go back to sleep, so they go off exploring. Fine, but then you don't need to send almost the ENTIRE crew down to an alien planet! A scout team of four would have sufficed. Or maybe just the android on recognisance.
7. They pilot the drop ship through a plasma storm, yet it is sunlight clear within seeing distance. Why not fly around the storm?
8. Its clear intelligent alien life was on this planet. It sent radio signals out, there are buildings everywhere and a city, even a spacecraft. All of which could have been scouted from the ship while it flew around first. Scouting your environment first is rule 1 in any explorers handbook."
to be continued