But she was a victim. She was afraid to take the bus by herself after it happened. That had nothing to do with her friends, that was before she told anyone after the incident.
That's not correct. I posted right after viewing the episode, and she only displayed fear after Maeve had dragged her to the police station, where she spent who knows how many hours being interviewed.
When she mentioned it on the bus they acted like it was her fault.
No one did. She was the only one who noticed it, and what she did was to insist to be let off the bus. What she
should have done is to insist the guy be thrown off the bus, but no one acted like it was her fault. Why, no one even communicated that they were aware of what had happened.
Being a victim, and accepting that one is a victim does not mean that they are weak, it just means literally that someone perpetrated a crime against them.
You can be a victim of many things. If I call you an idiot, you have been made the victim of verbal assault. Should that make you feel like a victim, just because some dick on the internet called you an idiot? Yes, jizzing on someone is in a completely different league - I would place it in the same league as someone deliberately smearing a cupcake on your jacket or something. Less gross, but the same invasion of privacy. The question is: what is the appropriate amount of trauma to feel over something like that? How delicate is it healthy to be?
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sslssg (30416)
3 years ago
You completely lost me at jizzing on someone as being in the same league as smearing a cupcake on someone. Wow! No. No. No. No. Not at all.
It's not up to someone else to decide how much trauma someone should feel.
The question isn't what is the appropriate amount of trauma? It should be, why do people continue to get away with behaving in such a manner?
No one did. She was the only one who noticed it, and what she did was to insist to be let off the bus.
Ummm she called out "He's wanking on me" No one did anything. The bus was supposed to be a safe place for her and it no longer was.
As for her afraid to get on the bus, you are correct it was after she reported it, I was mixing that up with something else and I'm sorry.
But, I still stand by what I said. The effects of sexual assault usually don't come up right away, and they can be felt for decades afterwards. There is such guilt, shame, and fear involved that affects so many aspects of ones life, and yes, even if it's just from someone masturbating in public while looking at you. Denial is also very strong and victims will often brush it off, and even make excuses for it. The others weren't making her feel like a victim, they were letting her know that she was a victim and that they too had similar things happen to them and that it is absolutely fine to be upset after something like that happens to you.
I will tell you the same thing that I tell everyone else. Go and volunteer at a sexual assault centre. Especially if you think that that is the same as smearing a cupcake on someone. God, having a stranger masturbate on you on public transportation is something that will stick with you for life. You watched that and saw her brushing it aside and saying that it wasn't a big deal and you believed her. You didn't see that she was traumatized and just pushing it aside. Why do you think she was reacting to her boyfriend the way she was? She wasn't okay even if she was pretending to be so.
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