MovieChat Forums > Guess Who's Coming to Dinner (1967) Discussion > If it were MY Daughter......

If it were MY Daughter......

posted 19 years ago by yttimsmc11
77 replies | jump to latest

I wouldn't have had a problem at all with the race thing...(if two people love each other, that's all that matters, and to hell with everyone else.) My problem would have been in how long they've known each other. 10 Days!!! Hardly long enough to know if you want to make a lifelong commitment like marriage.

In the 10 days they'd known each other all they did was have fun. They were in Hawaii, for crying out loud. No responsiblities, no hard times, no ups and downs.

If my daughter came home with ANY man (white, black or purple) after only knowing him 10 days, talking marriage, I'd have to put my foot down and be against it. I'd urge them to give it more time to get to know each other in their everyday lives. What's the big rush anyway?

......but it was Sidney Poitier after all, so that's understandable.

[–] JaneSchmo 18 years ago

You are suppossed to accept it as the premise and go on with the rest of the story. YEAH, RIGHT.They should have come up with something better than that. My revision; she's volunteering with the PeaceCorps as an English teacher and they met on one of his missions in Africa.

[–] roghache 18 years ago

You've missed your calling...you should be writing movie screenplays. No kidding, it's a great idea. And give them a courtship much longer than 10 days, please.

[–] Fugitive_at_imdb 18 years ago

I agree. Let Joey stay home and plan a wedding while Dr. Prentice finishes his tour in Switzerland. Then the two young love birds can go off and do as they please. Get married in Europe. Honeymoon in Australia. What have you.

We've all got money. She can fly out and visit during the waiting period, and take her mother with her. John can fly his folks out, too. And we can all get to know each other here in California as well. Prepare ourselves, as strangers, to get used to the idea of becoming a family.

I wouldn't care if my daughter was green and her young fellow purple. Hawaii was paradise, but now they've flown home. Time to settle down and get your wits about you. There'e the love you feel after a perfect vacation with a beautiful and powerful newly-found partner, and then there's the love you feel after 25 years of marriage with the arrogant stubborn old fool that you can't shake off anymore, no matter how hard you try.

Best to get a taste of this second kind of love before you rush off to holy matrimony. Is what I'm sayin'.

Terror with napalm
I want ya'll to STAY calm!

[–] roghache 18 years ago

Fugitive at imdb, you sound like someone with a clue about true love and marriage. If more couples were getting married these days after a whirlwind 10 day Hawaiian courtship of sun, sand, surf, palm trees, balmy star filled nights, and tall, cool tropical drinks...well, the divorce rate would be a lot higher even than it is. Before tying the knot, couples need to interact in their usual sometimes stressful environment of jobs, nasty weather, colds & flu, challenging family, annoying friends etc. The whole movie seems ridiculous with such hasty plans, the parents idiotic focusing on skin colour under these circumstances. Whatever were the screenwriters thinking?

[–] 18 years ago

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[–] roghache 18 years ago

The age difference wouldn't bother me, if the couple had known each other longer. My parents had an 11 year gap and a very happy marriage. But they knew each other a lot longer than 10 days before embarking upon it! It's the short dating period that's the problem.

[–] blackhawkswincup2010 18 years ago

Well, from my personal experience, my wife and I are both Caucasian, but I proposed to her on our 2nd date. We've been married over 27 years, and have six children and one grandchild.

We both remember thinking before that date that this would likely be the last one. We did a lot of connecting that night (emotional, not sexual), but neither of us felt the "head over heels" thing. We just knew it was right.

These things are situational. It worked for us, and to tell the truth, two of our daughters have had similar experiences. They are both married to very fine young men. But when I tell this story, I always add, "Don't try this at home!"

[–] minniemouse 18 years ago

I love this film and I always enjoy watching it.
After having considered the racial issue, the age gap and the 10-days courtship there still remains one thing that bothers me: after all it's quite easy for her parents to accept a black man as their son-in-law, because he's AN INCREDIBLY HANDSOME DOCTOR WITH WIDELY RECOGNIZED ACHIEVEMENTS IN HIS PROFESSION AND A BRILLIANT CAREER AHEAD OF HIM!
What if he was, say, a plumber, a salesman, or even a post-office employee?
Would they so easily give in? ;-)

[–] washcloud 18 years ago

U got a point there minniemouse...
I just want to add,tht the point here is "10 days",can be enough,when ur quite well off(like those two were supposed to be)..I mean,"not everyday ppl" sure can LIVE things differently..they got a different mentality alltogether..perception..and so on...
So,10 days,CAN be justified..and dnt u all forget,the lines of the dr: "we got no commitment here"...its just their "wish" that all go well,and they get married (soon too)..so i think "10 days" cannot be considered a "plot hole"...
And another thing minniemouse and everybody: ..the point was,if such a relationship COULD be based on solid grounds (facing the difference-in-colour problems,would just be one of the major drawbacks they'd have to confront)..so wht im saying is, if "Prentice" 'd be a caucasian/asian/indian/whtever
PLUMBER,,,they'd STILL have to prove "they were not elephants" to the parents..
(not to mention tht "making" them a rich daughter,and a succesful scientist,could deliver its "message" more smoothly to the audience (supposing the writer aimed at "educating" it...)
..Anyway,i think all n all the movie is a classic,a very succesful one,Tracy n Hepburn really rock in there (both as far as i remember having serious personal health problems while shooting it,which makes it even more admirable) ,and i also think miss Houghton was a near close to being perfcet choice for the cast(someone here suggested her acting sucked-dunno why)
(maybe the "only" "flaw" is how "suddenly" mr Tracy changes his mind alltogether (his speech isnt tht convincing abt why he did...)
...other thn tht,great script,directing
(unforgetable moment when mr Tracy puts his shaving brush into his drink :-),acting,photography even, n so on...
..and im not so sure abt how inter-racial relationships are today...but i DO have a feeling,tht "Guess Who's Comin To Dinner" , had something to do about them being somewhat more easy than back then,by nesting into the collective subconscious of the ppl...

[–] Daymare01 18 years ago

Things were different back then. My granparents got married after knowing each other less than 2 weeks, and they were married 35 years.

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[–] sellis1 14 years ago

>maybe the "only" "flaw" is how "suddenly" mr Tracy changes his mind alltogether

I agree. It was way too sudden.

[–] hachmom-1 17 years ago

I think this was the whole point, yes they make JOhn a borderline saint but they have to so that the only possible reason for objection is his race...if you were remaking the movie today the charecters would be much more nuanced

It is not our abilities that make us who we are...it is our choices

[–] Death_to_Pan_and_Scan 17 years ago

electrictoy,
You could have 5 college degrees and it won't change the fact that you seem to lack common sense and critical thinking or simply didn't put much thought into your first post and the numerous shock waves that your idea of the 2 people dating for 2-3 years would send through the film. Your idea simply doesn't work without changing a lot of things in the movie as should be readily obvious to even anyone without a college degree. Whatever job you got from those 2 degrees, keep your day job and please don't ever try to be a Hollywood script doctor.

----------

If you're watching 'Fullscreen' DVDs, you aren't getting the whole picture.

[–] elphaba_daae 17 years ago

The time thing bothered me too. But what was interesting was the 10 day courtship wasn't brought up at all, just the race issue. So this puts into perspective how the parents felt about race. Race was SUCH a big issue that a 10 day courtship wasn't brought up. Perhaps it was a political statement.

[–] hodayathink 17 years ago

I'm reading these comments, and realized something interesting. In the more recent "version" (and I'm using that term very loosely) of the movie called Guess Who http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0372237/, they did exactly what some people have suggested on this board, which was extend the relationship and have the parents just not know about his race. Now of course it wasn't a better movie, but I also don't think it made the plot that much better either. It isn't that huge of a suspension of disbelief that two people could want to get married after only knowing each other for ten days. Not likely, but as the few stories pointed out on this board show, definitely not impossible, either.

You can't play a playa, but you can always play along.

[–] bernie-122 16 years ago

Everybody here seems to be missing the point that this film was made in 1967 and would never have made it to the screen if it were a conventional romance in every way other than race. So it was necessary to do what Hollywood does best and add some unrealism to it. Well, a lot of unrealism.

Fact is, the whole thing was so implausible that nobody could take it seriously. That's the point. Maybe a little social engineering, to get the population a bit accustomed to the notion of interracial marriage. If so, it worked. Mixed marriages today aren't news, are they? Picking the film apart over plot points is a waste of time. The cardboard cutout stereotypes are behaving exactly as they should.

Hey, Death_to_Pan_and_Scan I like your moniker. And your cause. Long live 16:9. Death to 4:3.

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[–] pmiano100 17 years ago

Sidney Poitier was too good for her. He was a brilliant doctor and she was a ninny. To be fair, it was 1967, and interracial marriage was still controversial and far rarer than it is today. Fortunately, things change.

The only thing that gets me is why Poitier's character was still single at 35 if he was so great. In those days, 80% of all doctors were married by the time they graduated from medical school.

[–] 17 years ago

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[–] pmiano100 17 years ago

Thank you. Your point was well taken also. I will always be glad that I didn't buy into the prejudices so prevalent in both Italian and Puerto Rican neighborhoods in New York during my teenage years. Ironically, I met, courted (for over a year), and married my wife in Puerto Rico. My father, God rest his soul, didn't object, but he did say, "With all the Puerto Rican girls in New York, why did you have to go to Puerto Rico to get one?"

My reply was, "I went to the source."

[–] 17 years ago

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[–] ajbarlas 17 years ago

Poitier's character was a widower whose wife and child had been killed several years before in a car accident.

[–] pmiano100 17 years ago

I see. I must have forgotten about that. I still can't understand why he'd want a ninny like her though. Ms. Houghton was not the actress her aunt was and she played that role way too ditzy. That's why her movie career went south, although she achieved greater success in the theater. But then, everyone in the world is stupid in something or other. My wife of almost 32 years has two MA degrees and she still married me, and hasn't left me, killed me, or maimed me - yet. Thank you for the reminder. I haven't seen the film in years.