MovieChat Forums > Aftermath (2016) Discussion > What I've Learned from Aftermath

What I've Learned from Aftermath

posted 8 years ago by GreenInkBrigade
44 replies | jump to latest

1. Aviator shades aren't just for sunny days.

2. You can pick up fully automatic weapons at the local gun store.

3. Air Force special operations guys are combat-trained commandoes.

4. Skinny white chicks can be bad-ass AF special operators.

5. Wayne Brady can be a bad-ass AF special operator.

6. You don't need to aim a gun.

7. No training or practice is necessary to become proficient with all manner of firearms.

8. Having gasoline in plastic jugs strapped to the top of your RV while bullets are being shot at you presents no danger whatsoever.

9. Have your aviator shades on you at all times.

10. Amish guys weren't made for these end days.

11. When you need to bust through a chained gate, just drive your RV (your only form of transportation) through it. It'll bust through, the chains won't hold.

12. An RV that's been treated like a tank will show no signs of wear and tear.

[–] musasino 8 years ago

13. "When you run out of road, you stand with your family and you go down shooting." GUNZ 4 LYFE!

[–] wesperkins 8 years ago

14. When you see a road full of dead bodies with no eyes and black ooze coming out of them, take their pulse
15, Mermen are steroid using wife beating drunks
16. Before you plan on executing a family, have a round of scotch with them
17. Category 5 Hurricanes only last a few hours and may blow a branch down
18, Don't be In Seattle during the end of ten world
19, Dragons love steak and cows Rare
20. Cellphones will work just long enough to get a call in or a text in each day
21. Demon possession and schizophrenia are a lot alike, so make sure which one it is before you shoot someone
22. Demons are wimps. You can stand on a fence and shoot at demons and taunt them and they won't come back for you. Demons are like great college basketball players and one and done. They can't jump in another body apparently

[–] eisphoenix-655-672150 8 years ago

20a) And of course cell phones won't be affected by the EMP from the solar flare that killed off every other electronic device (was it ever explained why the lost daughter's cell phone was still working?).

[–] mooshki 8 years ago

Because her brother really, really wanted it to, so the mermaid granted his wish.

[–] GreenInkBrigade 8 years ago

23. Don't worry about including bolt cutters in your survival gear. If you need to get through a fence or a padlock, you can run over them with your RV.

24. It's okay to pimp out your 16-year-old virgin little sister to keep the soldiers guarding you happy.

25. By all means, let the crazy infected commando guy into the compound.

26. In the middle of Armageddon, mourning the recently departed takes precedence over reloading, securing the compound, burying the dead, checking for wounded, or resetting the traps that just went off.

27. Armageddon only attacks in waves. So, once you've beaten off an attack, you can rest, relax, and chat with confidence that another attack isn't imminent.

[–] Sneaky_Pedro 8 years ago

28. If you are being chased through the woods by three convicts, stop at a church and make out...

I always make my wife look under my ballz. No joke! Ticks look for warm places 

[–] Sneaky_Pedro 8 years ago

29. If you need to look for food in a remote camp with otherworldly creatures roaming around, stop at a barn and make out...

I always make my wife look under my ballz. No joke! Ticks look for warm places 

[–] Sneaky_Pedro 8 years ago

30. If some underage girl tells you it's OK to have sex because the world is ending, DO IT!
I know I would (if she had more meat on those bones and didn't look like a 12 year old kid)!

EDITED: It's unfair to say she has no b00bies, so I took it out.

I always make my wife look under my ballz. No joke! Ticks look for warm places 

[–] aereaus 8 years ago

But she doesn't. She could use band-aids as a bikini top.

[–] darkavenger77 8 years ago

31. After you've racked a round into the shotgun you've been carrying (with an empty chamber), rack another one in a few minutes later to let 'em know you're really serious now.
32. The guy playing the DJ is Vega from Motive (2013). I thought I recognized that voice!

Ignoring politics doesn't mean politics will ignore you.
-Pericles paraphrased in <100 characters

[–] archyros-30909 8 years ago

33. If someone asks you to shoot them, do it! When it's the end of the world, people know what they want...😎

[–] bugsaboot 8 years ago

34. You can chase an attacking rabid dog away by squirting them with a hose.

[–] poetryamuse 8 years ago

35. If someone asks you to change the channel, do it.