MovieChat Forums > General Discussion > What are your thoughts on “Incels”?

What are your thoughts on “Incels”?


Personally I feel sorry for them…they want a woman so bad but are bitter they can’t get one so they hate them

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'Incel' is a stupid, manufactured media term, lazy shorthand for attacking other people on social media.
'Woke" is equally boring swill. So is 'right winger' and 'Lib.'

I'm impolite and frequently unpleasant and not at all very well liked, but I am honest. The rest of you idiots should lay off each other.

You are beating each other up and the millionaires are turning into billionaires. You are sucking wind, hardly keeping the heat on. Fucking grow up.

These terms are lies and manipulations, drop it already.

You are being used.

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I'm pretty sure they named themselves that.

Signed, million man.

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I NAMED MYSELF CAPTAIN THUNDERCOCK...THE NAME ONLY TAKES ON MEANING IF OTHERS REPEAT IT.


INCEL IS A SHITTY MADE UP WORD THAT OTHERS ARE VALIDATING BY USING IT AND SPREADING IT AROUND.

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It's an abbreviation for involuntarily celibate. I agree with what you say. But it makes more sense than made up internet words like edgelord. Capiishe, Captain Thundercock? (That's your new name now)

Signed, million man.

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I AGREE WITH WHAT YOU SAY...BUT...THE WORD FINDS ITSELF RIGHT NEXT TO THE DUMPSTER...NOT INSIDE THE DUMPSTER...IT'S STILL DIRTY THOUGH...CAPTAIN THUNDERCOCK IS THE FIRST THING TO CAME TO MIND...SO YES...THAT'S MY NEW NAME.

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Is your post a knee-jerk echoing of dominant media narrative? Have you heard of the following movie made by a woman?

--It is not, however, an opinion shared by Alex Lee Moyer, the director of *TFW No GF*, a featured SXSW documentary that is now streaming on Amazon Prime. On the contrary, Moyer believes that incels have been woefully misrepresented by a hysterical media, intent on making disaffected young white men a cultural boogeyman. “These people feel adrift and they don’t have families that are super present, and they don’t have a lot of economic opportunities. A lot of them didn’t finish school,” she tells Rolling Stone.--

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Personally, I spend no time thinking about "incels." When did this even become a thing?

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Just another tactic used to divide people.


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Well if you take someone like Elliott Rodger, who was a good looking kid, and see that his personality was shit, you'd see that they do it to themselves. So yeah, I don't feel sorry for them. It's basically another word for loser.


Signed, million man.

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Women are the gatekeepers of dating and sex and when you have the power to determine which men are allowed to be sexual beings that is the very definition of privileged.

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So are you saying that women shouldn't be able to gatekeep who we date and who we have sex with?

I'm just trying to understand this comment. Shouldn't all people, men and women, have a say in that? Men reject people they don't want to be with, just like women do.

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The saying goes that women are the gatekeepers of sex, men are the gatekeepers of marriage.

It’s not meant to imply that anyone isn’t allowed to make their own choices. It’s just meant to acknowledge that one side typically controls that portion of the relationship.

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[–] blue1981 (5244) an hour ago
Women are the gatekeepers of dating and sex and when you have the power to determine which men are allowed to be sexual beings that is the very definition of privileged.


THAT IS NOT WHAT HE SAID OR WHAT HE MEANT.

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I was commenting on the saying itself, not his interpretation of it.

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It’s not meant to imply that anyone isn’t allowed to make their own choices. It’s just meant to acknowledge that one side typically controls that portion of the relationship.

YOU THEN CLARIFIED HOW IT'S NORMAL AND SANE THINKING...WHICH IT IS NOT BASED ON THE WAY THE OP SAID WHAT HE SAID.

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Again, I was commenting on the saying itself, not his interpretation of it. Just because someone misinterprets something, does not mean that they saying itself is flawed. It is normal and sane to say women control sex. They do, because they are far more selective with who they have sex with, than men are.

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I WILL HAVE TO TAKE YOU AT YOUR WORD...I HAVE NEVER HEARD THAT SAYING BEFORE.

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I am not familiar with that saying.

when you have the power to determine which men are allowed to be sexual beings that is the very definition of privileged.


This was more the part of the comment which made me pause and want to know what they were meaning. I think that all people are allowed to be sexual beings. The problem with a lot of the "incels" (male and female) is that they want a certain type of person. Now I'm not saying that people shouldn't be picky. Of course they should. But I think that often those complaining that they can't get someone, are either ignoring their own personality defects, or that they are going for looks alone.

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There is some truth to that, but I think it gives women too much credit. While lots of women may be attracted to the same guy, it’s not like there is a group effort to anoint some guys, and freeze out others. and removes accountability from men. I’m sure we’ve all known guys that had no businesses getting a lot of women, somehow getting a lot of women. I think people need to be careful about swallowing these saying as truth, and not even trying to live life.

You could always reverse it too. Men decide who gets to be a wife and who doesn’t, if that isn’t privileged, I don’t know what is.

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“Men decide who gets to be a wife

I think my wife used chloroform on me.

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And there are women who get a lot of men, who really have no business getting all those men.

Men decide who gets to be a wife and who doesn’t


Yeah...I'm pretty sure that I wasn't sold to my husband by my father, I remember having a choice there. I know you said that as a reversal of what the OP said, but I don't really think that either is particularly the truth.

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I was saying to reverse it to show how ridiculous it sounded. Some times people don't see it that way unless its something they can relate to.

But you are still missing the point. Men are the gatekeepers of marriage because typically women in a relationship are more ready and willing to get married and sooner. It's usually the man that has to convinced to settle down. When it comes to sex it's the opposite. Men have much lower standards for who they will sleep with, so is usually ends up being the woman who decides if they have sex or not.

These are generalizations though, they don't apply to every situation, and they don't imply that no one has a choice. When your husband proposed you have a choice to say yes or no. The statement just implies that you were probably ready to get married before he was.

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I think that generalizations are just that. Generalizations based on not really reality. My husband was actually ready to get married way before I was. He also was the one who wanted a wedding. I wanted to skip all that. I know I'm not the typical girl, but I also know a lot of women who feel the way I do. I know that no one is just like anyone else, and that stereotypes and generalizations just perpetuate the way things "should be" by some silly standard.

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We will have to agree to disagree on that.

I think generalization and stereotypes exist for a reason. They don’t have to be true 100% of the time, just more often than not. There are always exceptions, but the exceptions doesn’t disprove the rules.

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ME TOO...I PROPOSED TO THE "WIFE" AFTER A YEAR...GAVE HER A RING...SHE STALLED AND ULTIMATELY CHOSE NOT TO HAVE A WEDDING...SO TECHNICALLY I AM SINGLE...NOT A BAD TURN OF EVENTS SEEING AS HOW THE "WIFE" TURNED OUT TO BE THE DEVIL...BUT AFTER 20 YEARS I ASSUME "WIFE" IS STILL THE CORRECT TERM TO USE.

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Yay! You’re back! We missed you! 🎈

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Thanks.

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And look what you stumbled straight into - it’s like you were never away, lol.

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And it looks like it's not the only post on this topic. Glad to see 123guy is still doing what he does best.

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HE AND I HAVE BEEN WRESTLING A LOT LATELY.

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It’s been getting all kind of weird in here recently.

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I consider them a symptom of a larger problem.

In a healthy society the vast majority of men and women should be able to find compatible mates to mate with, and have and raise children, and hopefully age together and die together-ish.


But a number of developments, such as the growth of a significant "incel" community, AND over all lowering of sex, reproduction, marriage, happiness, ect, shows that our society is failing in this basic function.


A lot fo people like to respond to any mention of "incels" by simplying "punching down" at them to dismiss them or anything they have to say.

But that misses what to me is the real point. Society is failing it's members, in large and increasing numbers. This is a real problem.

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The problem is that men are still expected to be men, and approach women. Even modern women want men to be traditional in this way. But at the same time approaching women is almost always discouraged, or at worst, deemed harassment. So many men take this, along with the natural fear of rejection, and decide it isn’t even worth it try. Guys almost have to go against what is socially acceptable to date women in real life.

There is an alternative with online dating, which is what most people opt for, but that is an even bigger disaster.

It’s almost absurd to me that people 30 years ago were limited to people that they went to school with worked with, lived near etc, an people did t have problems, but with the entirety of the internet at their finger tips people are hooking up less, staying virgins longer etc.

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THere is no value in increased choices, if the goal is twisted away by the method.

Making the selection process favor hookups, when the goal is long term relationships, is a fail on all fronts.


Just watched this pretty good video on the subject that I thought made some good points.


https://video.search.yahoo.com/search/video?fr=mcafee&p=youtube+whatifalthist+why+are+you+lonely&type=E210US739G0#id=1&vid=ee976cb54bf56588e88001cd35f41d99&action=click

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I don't disagree, but remember this is a topic about incels. So I would consider increased choices that favor hookups a favorable outcome. The point I was making was even though they do have more choices, and they should be able to hook up easier, they are doing it far less than people were doing it before the internet. I think it's easier for people to isolate themselves, and never develop the social skills needed date, due to the hope of online dating. But it never really pans out that way.

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It is easy to just blame the "incels", which by some polls I've seen could count for a quarter of the male population under 30 now.


But I think that is not helpful. When that many males are falling out of the bottom of the dating pool, it is more than just them at fault.


Online dating enables them to put themselves out there, somewhat, but if the women looking have unrealistic expectations, and/or have been led to be looking for short term encounters with higher level men then that "more choices" is an illusion.


I think as a society we need to have a real discussion about what is wrong with modern dating, and modern marriage.

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I AM GOING TO COMPLIMENT YOU...I HAVE READ THIS THREAD...AND I ENJOYED YOUR POSTS AND AGREE WITH YOUR WORDS ALMOST ENTIRELY...GOOD JOB.

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Thank you.

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