Seriously this movie has some great one liners.
Rumsfield: you got a lawsuit on your hands mister
right after they burn down the klopecks house lol.
When they break into the house and ray uses the credit card and snaps it in half
"That was a *beep* store anyway"
Rumsfield: "There go the God damned brownies."
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"I've made a huge mistake."
Dammit! This guy stole the one I was gonna say thats a hell of a good line!
"Che Guevara's back, and this time he's all American!"
"We're not all here....Walter from down the street....nobody knows where the hell he is!" (hilarious)
Then, when they are over at the Klopek's and Rumsfield starts peeling their wallpaper off..lol....I mean, who does something like that!!!...lol
"Yup. Apparently, one day Skip just made too many lemon phosphates...el snapo"
share"Whoa! Jump a little higher there Sputnik!"
share"I don't know what to say. Whatdya want me to move?"
Ha, ha, ha! Love this movie!
"Whoa! Jump a little higher there Sputnik!"
Art making the analogy of Ray jumping back to a former Soviet Union space satellite being thrust into orbit thousands of miles is really a marvelous notion. What Art said was "Spud Web", a professional basketball player. Basketball players can jump pretty high but there is a bit of a a discrepancy between a man jumping a couple of feet and a USSR SPACE SATELLITE BEING LAUNCHED INTO ORBIT FROM EARTH.
[deleted]
Thanks for clarifying Brother Theodore-I originally thought it was a basketball player, but I couldn't figure out who(he says it kind of quickly) and so I went with the satellite. :)
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"Annettes tits are great"
Guys, this is awesome. I've been cracking up through the last eight pages of comments. I can't believe this one was not on there.
"God I love this street." - Ricky Butler
And when Art is going up to cut the power.
"Safety is my middle name." - Art
"I thought his middle name was Louis?" Ray to Rumsfield. Classic
Right before they are watching Hans take the "garbage" out...
"Well what's next? Tapping into their phone line?" - Ray
"That can be arranged." - Rumsfield
I love this movie.
Hey don't feel bad, Klopekswithcoppers, I thought the same thing until I watched with the closed captioning on.
Here's one, not a one liner exactly, but I thought funny and its subtle. The women are the straight "men" in the movie but Carol got one in with the help of Alex Trebek.
Answer: ...remain calm, float with arms stretched out at right angles to the body.
Carol: That's what you used to say to me in college, honey, right before...
Ray chuckles a bit...
One of my favorite parts is when Art takes a plate of food out of Walter's fridge, turns around, and BAM! Corey Feldman bursts through the swinging door and knocks it out of his hands. OMG...
Ray: "THAT'S great. Well, I think we've broken enough laws for one day."
Art: "It's not against the law to break cookies!"
Rumsfield: "who's gonna clean this mess? Well you're gonna clean this mess, cuz YOU are a garbage man(!)"
Klopeck: "Another neighbour?" - Rube: "..a fat one"
Great flick, a favorite.
"I hate cul-de-sacs, there's only one way out and the people are kinda wierd."
"What'd you say we all sit down for a little of the old face-to-face, hey there what-Rube?"
and as mentioned before:
"What've ya' got in the cellar "HAIR" Klopek?!"
TLC don't want no scrubs!share
"What've ya' got in the cellar "HAIR" Klopek?!"
my faves were all by rumsfield, he was hilarious
"i'll staple his ass shut!"
"oh, that's about a 9 on the tension scale, Reub"
most of the best ones have already been said.
But i like when Rumsfeld says to Rube, 'Walter, we don't know where the hell he is' and then 'terrible thing the plight of the elderly' when Rumsfeld is no spring chicken himself.
x
Yeah exactly, and the context in which "The plight of the elderly" is said is just so outrageously funny. I would take it that that quote would normally mean the struggles one would endure with ailing physical and mental health as one ages. The way Rumsfeld says it indicates that Walter has obviously been abducted by someone (presumably Klopec's). So in Rumsfelds' mind "The plight of the elderly" has abduction suffixed to the end of the physical and mental woes... LOL!!!
shareRAY: Nobody knocks off an old man in my neighborhood and gets away with it.
This is from the alternate ending on the dvd, it always cracked me up.
DETECTIVE: What's your date of birth?
HANS: I dunno
DETECTIVE: Nobody ever told you when you were born?
HANS: No
(Fireman bumps into Hans and he has a slight freakout)
DETECTIVE: You don't get to the beach much, do you?
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Luv always,
Livi
http://www.twelvecabinstwelvevacancies.tvheaven.com
i don't remember that interaction, at least not on my old vhs.
share"oh, that's about a 9 on the tension scale, Reub"
hmm.. I guess I'll need to turn the captions on because I've always interpreted this as "that's about a 9 on the attention scale"... which would be appropriate, too.
All the best quotes have been mentioned, but to reiterate again:
"Sardine?"
"I've never seen that... .drive their trash down the driveway... bang the hell out of it...never seen that"
It's the alternate ending offered on the DVD. I hope if the release this on BluRay that they include outtakes, deleteds, alternate endings and commentaries.
shareReuben: Ok hepcats, get off my CAR!!!!
Reub's facial expressions alone are sheer comedy...
About 10 years ago I had a VHS tape of this movie and I remember one day I watched that part 50++ times. Started with Reub coming into frame and taking stock of the situation with the "hoodlums" on his car, and ended with Reub calling them imbeciles and sub-morons haha! The contrast between these two different types of people is incredibly funny.
share"It's just a piece of litter... the guy's a litterbug... uh, no, it's my note."
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